Hiii Friends,

Apparently its Katie Johnston's big 25er! Yes, APPARENTLY! So come on down to Barney's Beanery in Pasadonuts THIS FRIDAY to celebrate the end of Katie's smoking, drinking and kissing habits! Katie has plans to be 25 and live CLEAN from here on out. No Miller, no Camels, no Herpes Simplex B! So she needs your help in drinking, smoking and kissing the MOST before she has to Q-U-I-T. So come wearing your most comfortable shoes, your drinking cap, your smoking jacket and your less than chapped lips. Feel free to bring all the cronies you like for a fun Friday evening bender at the always entertaining Barney's Beanery on Colorado Blvd.

Birthday gifts should include (but are not limited to): yoga mats, sports bras, UnderArmor, 3 Day Juice Fast recipes, air purifiers, colon cleansing solutions, incense, supportive underwear, gift cards to Jamba Juice and personal training sessions with handsome young bucks.

Hope to see ya'll there! Bring your friends and even foes! Or maybe just some hos! 

Let us knows! 

Van Waes is turning 28, but he ain't outta the woods yet.

Hello there!

You have been pre-selected to come to The Woods and celebrate the soon to be 28 rings on the trunk of Michael J.* Van Waes.

He may be old as goats, but VW's still got plenty of deforesting to do. And don't expect to count the rings on his trunk without buying him a drink first.

"Fishing," "hunting" and "logging" are on tap for the night, so prep your baitin', shootin' and log jammin' skills. And study up on those angiosperms, earlywoods, hardwoods and pulpwoods, cause you never know when you'll meet a sapling in need of pollination.

So put on your re-trendied plaid, grab your favorite lumberjacks and janes, and head to the woods for a bit of knotty fun. We hear the local foliage makes for exceptional foraging.

(*The "J" stands for "jenius")